THE FAMILY'S HOPE

I've been scanning some diaries when a thought crossed my mind: it was as if I was looking at some frame of a cinenovela that had happened before: >>it was about my parents and my elder brod. * Jim had always been Nanay's "favorite"....or so it seemed to most of us since he began school. He always was ahead of his batch.He later ended graduating as Class Valedictorian in HS with 6 Gold Medals in so many fields... He was even elected Boy Mayor of Manila that time..... How Nanay was sooo proud to come up the stage and help don the medal on him! I can only recall Nanay's countenance that day! She was full of hope and pride! No one can take that away from her. We felt equally proud, too! But of course! After all, we belong to one family with distinct family name in that neighborhood. Almost everyone knew us..... with the entire neighborhood extending their Congratulations, salutations... That was real Cool! Indeed! ** When he entered college, he was still top of the class! He earned such scholarships that he whisked through college in a breeze. At home, he always had the best "ulam"...with the rest of the brood making 'tiis' because Jim had to eat better because he is the family's HOPE for a better tomorrow. *** He later passed the Licensure Exams with flying colors, having placed third over-all.He became a legit and licensed Chemical Engineer. Of course, at that time, he was still living with us. A few weeks later, he was hired by a leading food corporation. He must have been good,since he was placed at the Quality Control section of the Company. He used to sweet-talk [now I call it that!, but then I was awed by it all] my Nanay about things he would buy her once he got his first salary...blah-blah-blah! He even had Nanay tell him where she wanted the new oven range and washing machine placed, that is, to replace the old one Tatay bought. After three weeks, he suddenly moved out of the house leaving Nanay and the rest of the family bitter over his decision. WHY? Nanay used to say: "Natakot kayanin ang responsibilidad..."..."Ayaw tumulong.." "Hindi pa nga nakakasuweldo,..umalis na!" and all those bitter remarks. We learned later that he moved in with his gf,a nursing student from Mindanao. They rented an apartment somewhere in Mandaluyong. He never extended help in any form to our family who were struggling to make both ends meet. At that time, it was a crucial issue: that of extending financial help to the family. We were 8 in the family, and all were studying.... My father was suffering from his Ulcer at that time and couldn't work.... so I guess, my family needed every penny we can have. I tried to look at it as something my brother had to do. But my mother looked at it as abandonement in time of need. A year later, I graduated from college and had taken on the burden [is it?] of providing for the family until my father got well. **** A couple of years later, my brother separated from his gf. I know. He visited me in Alabang carrying a baby girl,and planned to give that baby to me. I was hesitant to do as he says, and asked why.He confessed he separated from the gf and was having this problem about the baby.The baby, of course, having been uprooted from familiar surroundings did not stop crying. That wailing and the thought that the mother might be looking for her...made me tell Jim to bring her back to her mother.The gf then decided to go back to Davao and tell her parents about her single-motherhood. ***** NOW...why am I writing about all these? It is common for young people to think of themselves and forget the parents who treated them well when they were still helpless. When the time for us to graduate comes, most, if not all,start to think where to spend the first "suweldo." I'll make a wild guess: it'll all be for personal things> none for the parents who reared them up and guided them to be the person they are now. ALTHOUGH most people now say that helping the family is a thing of the past... ... Well, let me tell you something: IN ASIA....WE HAVE STRONG FILIAL RELATIONSHIP and we are family-oriented. The same is true in Korea, China, or even in Japan. Tumutulong din monetarily ang mga anak sa magulang sa gastos sa bahay. OO at merong instances na well-off ang parents. Sa ganitong panahon, ayos lang na huwag magbigay kada suweldo. Pero kapag nangangailangan ang magulang, hindi ba dapat din, na kahit konting pagtingin, mag-share din tayo????Ewan ko... but this is just my personal opinion.... I won't elaborate on what I've done, but ...>"let your good deeds speak for itself"<, Nanay used to say. Remember, in The Ten Commandments, there is ONLY ONE Commandment that has a PROMISE: "LOVE AND HONOR THY FATHER AND THY MOTHER, THAT ALL MAY BE WELL WITH YOU." I believe in my heart that this is true. Treatinmg our parents well and with respect bring us Good Karma... .It did to me, and it might do the same thing to all of you! Besides, there is an old adage that says: "TREAT YOUR KIDS WELL WHEN THEY ARE YOUNG, ,SO THAT WHEN YOU GROW OLD, THEY, TOO, WILL TREAT YOU WELL." Kapag minaltrato mo ang magulang mo,makikita/mapapansin yun ng anak mo. "SA MATA NG BATA, ANG LAHAT NG GINAGAWA NG MATATANDA AY LAGING TAMA." * God Bless, everyone!